Not all box art is created equal. That’s why in our weekly box art reviews, we bring the hammer of judgment down upon new releases. On deck…

“TNA iMPACT!” (Xbox 360, PS3, PS2)
What the Box Tells Us: Not sure if there’s TNA, but there’s definitely iMPACT! A bunch of burly-looking men strike menacing poses on the cover of this wrestling title.
Pros: Wrestling is no laughing matter, I’m sure, but this cover made me giggle. I love the grill that says “impact” on that guy’s teeth. And the guy flying in the air about to elbow somebody else in the face is a nice touch.
Cons: The mist on the box seems arbitrarily placed — a smoke screen perhaps? Is wrestling trying to hide something? Because it’s totally real, right?
Love It or Leave It: Love it.

“Hell’s Kitchen” (Wii, DS)
What the Box Tells Us: There’s a man with a glazed look in his eyes and whose hair is on fire.
Pros: If you know the reality cooking program, you’d probably recognize who this is and what this game is about instantly.
Cons: If you’re like me and don’t watch the TV show, then showing a large close-up of host chef Gordon Ramsay doesn’t tell me much of anything. I looked him up, and he’s supposed to be difficult-to-please and short-tempered, but here he just looks plain bored. Any text pertaining to the TV show or anything related to cooking would be helpful.
Love It or Leave It: Leave it.

“Zoids Assault” (Xbox 360)
What the Box Tells Us: Viewed through what looks to be a security camera or night vision, we can see military-type vehicles sitting parked in a garage amidst neatly placed ammunition.
Pros: You can see exactly the kind of vehicles (”Zoids”?) this game has.
Cons: But these vehicles aren’t doing anything. What kind of “assault” is this? A dormant one?
Love It or Leave It: Leave it.

“Active Life Outdoor Challenge” (Wii)
What the Box Tells Us: It’s all the fun and exercise of the outdoors — inside — and on a plastic mat!
Pros: The box art designers managed to cram as much as they could onto the box, including a copy of the game box and two “Active Life” pads.
Cons: What’s with the kid? He’s glowing and hovering in mid-air. Cryptic.
Love It or Leave It: Leave it.

“Spore” (PC, Mac)
What the Box Tells Us: It says, “From the creator of The Sims,” and from first glance “Spore” must be like the daily-life simulation game, only now you play the daily lives of strange-looking, bug-eyed aliens in space.
Cons: While it’s from the the creator of “The Sims,” that’s all we know from the front of the box.
Pros: Who cares. The bug-eyed aliens are adorable.
Love It or Leave It: Love it.